Election guide?

I've received a truckload of sensationalist political crap in my mailbox. Day of election, I get an email link to a "non-partisan guide to mayoral candidates." Mind you - ELECTION DAY I'm receiving this email. And the guide? It doesn't have two candidates on it. "Responses unavailable at time of printing." Is it because the candidates didn't respond? Or more likely, considering that I'm receiving this announcement on election day, these people started their process way too late. San Francisco politics... it would be like a high school election, except the stakes are a little higher.

The Big Apple

Now knowing several people who have moved to New York, I pick up my neighbor's old New York Times,  and it solidifies in my mind: There are some things that New York really is better at.  There are things that make enterprises or attempts in other places look like wannabe amateurs. But not everything. The Sunday Magazine might as well be a Pottery Barn flyer. The Travel Section has a caption referring to "stand-up paddle surfing on Lake Parano'a."  There is not a wave in the picture,  and New York is too far from Hawaii to call it paddle boarding?  Or maybe in Brazil it goes by a different name or there's a translation problem.  But I like to think it's because there's a snooty travel editor who got their job by knowing someone and would choose immersion in a good book over immersion in the waters of a lake in Brazil. Yes,  that house in Connecticut looks lovely,  if only slightly more scenic than my brother's place in the Midwest which is the same size but maybe a fifth the cost. I will retain my exaggerated sense of self importance,  and let them have theirs.

Doesn't speak English??!!

There is a sandwich shop that's one of my regular places. Good sandwiches, good price. Saturday, much to my surprise, I realized the guy behind the counter, whom I've seen for over 2 years, has a very limited understanding of English. I recall one other occasion when I came in and told him something, just being conversational, he just sort of nodded his head. Now I know, he probably didn't understand a word of what I said.

It happened when a lady came in and wanted a SALAD instead of a sandwich. There are no salads on the menu. She tried to explain, just put everything on the plate with the bread on the side. She tried to say it five different ways, finally gave up and left. Hey lady, it's a SANDWICH shop - and heck, after the 2nd attempt, I realized he didn't understand what she was saying, so just give it up, right??

The same day, a tourist wandered in and asked if they had lattes. Huh? This is a sandwich shop. You order what's on the menu, you get it, it's good. Don't go gettin' fancy.

Actually, now that I think about it - I always liked seeing the guy there, because he made good sandwiches. When the relatives were there, it wasn't the same consistent quality. But in retrospect - the relatives actually speak English. One of them said "Hey - haven't seen you in awhile?" The guy never said that - and when I tried to explain to him why I hadn't been around for awhile, I just thought he was indifferent. Nope. He didn't understand what I was saying.